Why do I even bother explaining myself to you?? Why do I try so much for you to understand me? Why do I bother, when you don’t give a damn?? You definitely don’t care about how I feel.
It’s so very sad and heartbreaking. I always end up feeling guilty over my emotions. I end up resenting myself for being so emotionally weak, but I can’t help it.
Actually I hate myself for it.
I hate myself for not being able to control my emotions. I hate myself for not being able to be stronger. I hate myself for showing you my weaknesses. I hate myself for being so vulnerable before you. I resent this helplessness.
I wonder to myself, why?? Why do I even bother?? Why do I even try to show you my pain?? Why do I, when you provide no comfort at all??
PS: I thought of cutting myself today. I even tried, but the blade was too blunt. It wouldn’t cut.